Sunday, November 3, 2013

Some Of My Favorite Menopause Jokes

At a bar mitzvah yesterday, the woman next to me asked what I do for a living.  When I explained that I'm a blogger and gave her the name of this site, she immediately launched into her own story of hot flashes and mayhem.  We also began trading menopause jokes.  In honor of another sister in menopause, here are some of my favorite jokes about The Change Of Life:

"Mom Having A Hot Flash" by the 8-year old

  • If prison wardens were all menopausal women, crime would not exist.
  • Trusting a menopausal woman to control her emotions is like trusting a tornado to mow your lawn.
  • One way to make living with a menopausal woman easier is to pretend she was abducted by aliens and replaced by an imposter. But don't let her know or you'll be wishing aliens would abduct you.
  • Where do 50-something people look for fashionable glasses?  Their foreheads.
  • They're not hot flashes: they're power surges.
  • What's the difference between a pit bull and a woman in menopause?  Lipstick.
  • When is a smart man most likely to complain about the mood swings of his menopausal wife?  When she's not present.
  • You know you have a menopausal brain when "getting lucky" means finding your car keys.
  • If scientists ever find a cure for menopause, our big problem will suddenly become global cooling.
  • What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause? Keep very busy. 
    Thank you for reading!  Please come back again soon!


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