I've written before about how I'm navigating the waters of the teenage years (read my 6 Rules To Help The Teen This Summer . And while these rules still apply, every year, Junior changes and I am forced to change with him.
|All Images From Pixabay|
Earlier this year the Teen hit the
I DON'T WANNA Stage.
Every time I ask the Teen to do something, no matter how innocuous, he rolls his eyes as if I'm asking him to remove one of his lungs and wails, “I don't wanna.” When I persist, he resolutely defends his position (“the garbage doesn't need to be taken out yet” or “why vacuum when the carpet is only going to get dirty again?”). It's reminiscent of the Terrible 2s. It takes a litany of “just do its” and a little threatening (that iPad WILL be mine) before anything gets done.
This year, I left Junior's summer activity up to Dad. My teenager has outgrown our town's summer camp, but he needed to do something. After a lot of arguing which I, blissfully was NOT a part of, my son and his father agreed that the teen would attend the YMCA's 3- Week Teen Travel Camp; it had a lot of activities Junior wanted to do (rock climbing, laser tag, outings to water parks and baseball games) with the clincher being one of my son's friends was signing up. After paying the $1,500 fee, the Teen was in.
Well, not so much. There have been mornings I've still had to argue with my late riser, since he gets up at noon if left alone, that YES, he has to go to Teen Camp. He packs his stuff, asks me for money for additional snacks, and after I drop him off, I don't hear from him until later in the day when he needs a ride home. Sure, he could walk, but he's “too tired.” He's had quite a few arguments with dad about going the next day because he doesn't like the activity. Dad has one every argument with the “but we paid $1,500 for you to go and by God, you're going.” Camp has been supplemented with lots of wonderful get togethers with his teenage friends and sleepovers.
We'll see what happens in two weeks. Camp will be over and he'll be biding time until our summer vacation and the start of Marching Band Camp at the end of August. We had the Teen's bike professionally tuned up and got him a bigger bike helmet since apparently his brain grew.
I am digging my heels in that I will NOT be driving him hither and yon. You want independence, fine. Here are two wheels to take you there.
I fully understand the I DON'T WANNA Stage, just as I understood the Terrible Twos. There's a realization that life isn't fun all the time; we need to do things that just need to get done in order to survive. I'm glad my teenager tells ME and his father that, rather than teachers, coaches, or camp counselors who know him as an agreeable kid (!!). The I DON'T WANNA Stage, which I also call the Lazy Schlub Stage, is normal, even if it's a force to be reckoned with.
One day soon I will miss my son – but not this period of time.
Thank you for reading! And please visit my other blog, Mom's Crayon!