Tweets About Menopause - Part I

I just joined Twitter, that quickie-message social networking site, because I've been told it's a great place to promote my blog.  Don't know about that yet, but being on it does make me feel...modern.  I mean, Facebook is so fake, with people bragging about their kids, their lives, etc.  Life ain't THAT perfect, people!  And Instagram is TOO instant; I don't want to see the lives of my friends told in pictures (not that I run with a crowd that would).  But exchanging banter in 140 characters?  Now that's my kind of communication!

The aspect of Twitter that I'm enjoying most so far is reading what other people post, especially as it pertains to The Change Of life.  So for those who are not on Twitter yet, here are some of this week's more amusing Tweets about my dear friend, Menopause.

Just a few notes before we begin:

1.  Apparently spelling doesn't count on Twitter because the messages have to be brief.  I have, therefore, left the Tweeter's spelling intact.  Didn't want you to think that my Spell Check was broken.
2.  Any comments I might have (it IS my blog, after all) are in bold after the Tweet.

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"My mom started crying because her fruit snacks fell under her seat in the car... wtf...menapause?"  Maybe she just REALLY wanted those snacks!

"Trying to fall asleep with all the windows open, no covers and even cuddling with a ice pack, but its still too hot."

"Feel like karate kid part 10 with all of these hot flashes. sheets on / sheets off. gotta be a black belt by now."

"Another morning, another stressful 20 minutes for my dearest mother as she frets over where she's put the key."

"My moms mood swings < #Menapause . Go to sleep or something crazy women I'm watching tv."   Yes, because your TV watching is the most important thing on those women's minds.

"Bout to be a riot in this stadium. Refs better their backs before they get speared by angry middle aged women with pom pons."  Yes, and at our age, our pom pons are sagging and HEAVY!
"My mom just started crying because a little girl in the doctors office was crying because she didn't want a shot." 

"Currently leaving o'charlies because my mom wasn't happy with the bread roles."  Sorry, but those of us at a certain age are particular about our rolls. 

"A whole week away with the mother goose were not even at the airport yet and I could press the ejector seat button."

"It is freezing in my house n my moms got the AC on."

"Which kid is where?  Is that my husband?  No its the cat.  And it's hot in here...*#!"

"I think that girl got menapause cause everytime she walk by, Every man'll pause."  Yeah, great pick-up line.  Wanna pick-up middle-aged women?  Just carry a fan.

"My hairstylist shared with me today that her bf has one testicle & her pubic hair is thinning due to menapause."  My condolences to her best friend.

And my favorite Tweet of the week:  "OMG. I just realized that in order to be a"trophy wife, " I would have to marry a 90 year old man."

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By the way, if decide to join Twitter, look me up!  My Twitter name is IsItHotInHereMM.

Thank you for reading!!